I keep writing the same stuff. Some of my posts are short enough to be tweets. My girlfriend tells me I take too long on the toilet.
And for those reasons, this is the last Potty Mouth post ever.
It’s a saddish day, but I’m ready to move on to bigger and better things. Expect my blog where I analyse television shows to pop up on your Facebook and Twitter news feeds within a few weeks.
I’ve achieved a lot with Potty Mouth but it has always been a means to an end – a way of practicing how I would write for much more culturally significant blogs. Thanks for hanging around these past 6 months.
Bye for now.
At midnight tonight, Potty Mouth turns half a year old. Let’s reflect on the half-year that was.
This entry marks the 123rd post over 184 days (by my calculation). That’s roughly 2 posts every 3 days. Nice.
I’ve been staying afloat posting about my daily activities and other mindless rabble but it’s time to concede that Potty Mouth isn’t going to reach one year at this rate. I need to make some radical change – mix up what I blog about or even break the code and change when I blog.
But I can’t do it without you. Where do you want to see Potty Mouth go? To dizzying new heights or vanish from the cyber world completely? Please comment!
In the whole time I’ve been blogging on Potty Mouth, my phone’s never been rung whilst on the loo. I think that’s pretty amazing.
Actually, the one time the phone did ring was when I used my girlfriend’s. How is it that the one time I use her phone, it gets rung but mine doesn’t? It’s as if my friends and family know I’ve got important blogging matters to attend to.
Speaking of blogging matters, there are some awful blogs out there. My friends and I have just spent the past half hour flabbergasted by how unoriginal and underwhelming one particular blogger’s efforts were. I know that my blog would leave a lot to be desired in the minds of many but at least I try to be a little unpredictable and more three-dimensional. Sheesh.
As the days drag on, my posts are getting worse and worse. Gone are the days of positive feedback – I blog purely for the sake of sitting on the toilet now.
I feel the end is truly nigh for Potty Mouth. I started this blog for the sake of getting more confident in writing for online audiences and I feel as though I’ve achieved this. My blog doesn’t really serve a purpose beyond that.
My girlfriend and Zoe just came into the bathroom. They would like to inform you that my poo does not smell like rainbows.
Gees, I’m coming up on 100 posts. Such a momentous occasion calls for a special edition post but I’ve been caught completely off guard. Also, how is that it’s nearly midnight, there’s next to no one on the corridor and yet someone’s brushing their teeth as I write? Nupi always seems to follow me into the bathroom and tonight is no exception.
She’s gone! The serenity! Love you Nupi but the splash is a very private moment between a man and his poo.
Anyway, back to the 100th post: what am I to do? Haven’t done a review in a while but it would have to be a pretty epic review for such an event. No, I need something more and I’m open to suggestions: you decide. If you’re one of the few souls who actually click on the SERF to get to my post, then my fate rests with you: what will be the 100th post?
So it turns out I survived my birthday party. The speeches were fantastic and were only a little embarrassing in the grand scheme of things. One thing I did take away from a part of the speech is that it is quite likely that Potty Mouth has very little appeal to my audience (the quote in the post title framing a sentiment of one particular speechmaker).
So am I going to stop posting? Nah. This stuff might be mindless garbage that practically no one’s interested in, but it’s probably the most productive thing I can do on the dunny. And if just one person reads a post everyday, I know I’m making a difference in some sort of insignificant and really weird way.
A strange man once wrote: “Poo often and post plenty”. That man was me.
So for uni, we’re having to create our personal online identity – how we want to be perceived on the Internet. This video I made last night strongly alludes to the kind of open and honest identity I want to pursue and also really gets at the heart of what Potty Mouth is all about (expect to see it on the ‘What is Potty Mouth Anyway?’ page in the coming days).