Category: Sad Times


I keep writing the same stuff. Some of my posts are short enough to be tweets. My girlfriend tells me I take too long on the toilet.

And for those reasons, this is the last Potty Mouth post ever.

It’s a saddish day, but I’m ready to move on to bigger and better things. Expect my blog where I analyse television shows to pop up on your Facebook and Twitter news feeds within a few weeks.

I’ve achieved a lot with Potty Mouth but it has always been a means to an end – a way of practicing how I would write for much more culturally significant blogs. Thanks for hanging around these past 6 months.

Bye for now.


The Fuzz

My facial hair sucks. Its colour is completely disproportionate to my head hair. Usually you’d get away with that eccentric reddish mo or the rugged grey-flecked beard. But no, my face settles for a thinned out blonde that looks deceptively like bumfluff in the end. Just look at it:

Keeping the hair for a film just doesn’t seem like a reasonable excuse when you look that shit.

An Apology

At the advice given by my brother, I’ve pulled the latest Two Jay video off YouTube. Though I didn’t see it at the time, the video’s content was perverse and offensive and didn’t get at what I want the series to be about and for that, I am truly sorry.

Though I don’t say much in the video, editing the material together and posting it online makes me wholly complicit in allowing the pretty controversial material from getting out from under closed doors. And that’s just it: the stuff spoken about in the video should be kept far more private. I’m not saying that what was said in the video was totally abhorrent and rarely spoken of – people of our demographic are kidding themselves if they don’t think this kind of nonsensical banter isn’t a staple in the conversations between many members of our generation – but that doesn’t mean it negates the potential to offend certain people.

Perhaps more alarming than anything else is that none of the people who live at college alerted me of the video’s offensive nature. In the college bubble, controversial themes tend to pervade many aspects of our everyday lives and it’s no surprise that some people have become emotionally desensitised by this. Nonetheless, I do not fling blame at these people; the editing and distribution of the video was my doing and if there is any one person whose actions are to be scrutinised, look no further than yours truly.

I imagine some who read this might think I’ve reacted too irrationally to my brother’s criticism; that I’ve dramatised circumstances (I will concede there are far worse and more explicitly offensive videos out there to be seen) but I don’t want to make anyone feel marginalised by a fun little series I decided to make in my college years. Sure, Two Jay has raised eyebrows in the past, but ‘Hypothetical’ brought a different (and far less desirable) mood to the series. It’s time to get back to its clean(ish) fun roots.

Thank Adam, for keeping me grounded.

Feeling Overexposed

What a bummer. With the end of the production phase of our documentary looming, we had our “last” shoot today (“last” because we learned, upon playback, the footage is way too overexposed). It’s a fault on no one’s part; I won’t bore you with jargon but we took pretty much all the precautions to make sure the footage turned out awesome but the filmmaker gods frowned upon us today.

Now I’m going to cheer up with some Clash of Kings (yes, I’m a slow reader) and get some other work done.

A Drunken Outburst

As the days drag on, my posts are getting worse and worse. Gone are the days of positive feedback – I blog purely for the sake of sitting on the toilet now.

I feel the end is truly nigh for Potty Mouth. I started this blog for the sake of getting more confident in writing for online audiences and I feel as though I’ve achieved this. My blog doesn’t really serve a purpose beyond that.

My girlfriend and Zoe just came into the bathroom. They would like to inform you that my poo does not smell like rainbows.

“Good” Charlotte

Do you know what’s sad? I’ve had Good Charlotte’s I Just Wanna Live stuck in my head all day. Why? It hasn’t even played anywhere recently. It’s just unfair. Could that band be any worse too? Joel or Benji or whoever the hell sings has got one of the most grating voices and generally sounds like a whiner.

What a way to spend your birthday.

Blog Jam

Blergh. Blogging is becoming a bit of a chore these days. Some days I’d seriously rather read a chapter of A Game of Thrones or brain out over an Infinity Blade sesh but my Potty Mouth conscience forbids it.

Perhaps you can help. What’s a way to keep Potty Mouth fresh and exciting for you and I?